When I Get to Heaven....

First of all, what a weird picture, right? I mean, when I saw it, I just had to use it because when in the world would you ever think to yourself, "Man, I just wish I had a blurry picture of an angel with humongous wings swinging!"
Anyway, I think about heaven a bunch, and not necessarily in a completely theologically accurate way. Loggins has told me that she thinks she'll be Latina when she gets to heaven, which is a possibility. I'll attend the gospel church service and maybe join the awesome choir since I plan on having a voice like Mandisa.
I will have a lot of stuff to do and a lot of people to talk to when I get to heaven, because basically anytime I've ever read anything in the Bible and been like, "Why did Peter do that?" or "What do you think Jesus wrote on the ground?" my mom's answer was always, "You can ask him when you get to heaven."
But here's the deal:
I think some of those guys will be totally approachable... like the disciples. But... can you imagine trying to talk to David? I mean, he's possibly my favorite guy in the entire Bible, and I actively try to tell people that they're having David moments no-matter-what-they're-going-through. But... I cannot fathom walking up to him and being like, "Hey Dave! So listen... ten years in that cave, right? Pretty tough!"
I mean, the Bible constantly reminds us what ruffians the disciples were, so I imagine James and John to be like actual sons of thunder - you know - like Pigpen and the Tasmanian Devil all wrapped up into one blur of mischief. Nathanael, a man after my own heart, put his foot in his mouth as soon as he even heard of Jesus, so he's probably my go-to-guy when I get to heaven. And Paul had a lot of experience of talking to people who get it wrong all the time, so I think I'll be cool with him. I mean... I think he'll be patient, you know?
But Stephen? oh my gosh.... Ezekial??
Esther might be cool with me... but Job??!!

It's a little intimidating.

Who would be your first person to stop and talk to in heaven, if it worked that way?
(and... it most likely doesn't.)

The Alternative: Horse and Buggy

I shouldn't even write about this, since I'm about 1/10 of the way to deciding to become Amish anyway. I mean ... there are seriously a lot of things that attract me to the lifestyle that I can't even get into now. On to the purpose of this post:

Car accidents drive me crazy.


I was in a (very small) accident about a year ago, and it was one of the most traumatizing things in my life. It was not the first accident I've been in, nor was it the worst as far as physical damage goes, but emotionally - it was tough. First, because the person who hit me just drove away. So here I was, dealing with consequences all on my own, wondering why... why would someone drive away? What had they been doing? Why me and my car?
I mean, my car is no jewel to begin with. But now, it's smashed in one side, the tires are awful, and yes, it has stayed that way. I don't have the money to repair it (it's not worth the repairs), and my insurance company totaled the car. So for the past year I've struggled with my vanity and drove around my less-than-cute car. And I learned a lot of lessons along the way.
I am incredibly thankful that no one (I suspect ... I mean, the person who drove away didn't seem so hurt) was hurt in the accident. My car was still drive-able, and has been for a year while I save my money for a new car. There's so many blessings to consider in this case, and I remind myself of them often, because I can often find myself sinking into the whole "I feel so sorry for me!" attitude, which is pathetic.
Which brings me to my next point:

Why are there so many car accidents?

I know, I know. There used to be horse accidents, and now there are car accidents, and at some future point it will be hovercraft accidents or whatever. But I hate them. I really really hate them. Deaths that result from car accidents are the ones that I really feel like the people were stolen from me. I don't know how to explain that, since no death is good, but that's just how I feel.

In conclusion: Use horses, not cars.

My journey to SELF Discovery, cont'd: What if I only had a week to live?

I made my weekly....I mean monthly trip to my counselor this past week. She always asks me hard questions that I have been trying to figure out for, well, my ENTIRE life. I am aghast when she wants an immediate answer and, in turn, she is annoyed when I don't give one.
This week her questions was: If you had one week to live (and you still had to work), what would you do?

ME: Um........Um......Maybe go out west......?!?!?!!??! I don't know.

HER: If YOU had ONE week to live, YOU would GO OUT WEST?!

I am always dumbfounded when she asks me random questions like this. A job puts major restraints on my ideal “dying” week. My real answer is: If I had one week to live; I would quit my job, convince my family to travel to Italy with me and die in the beauty of Tuscany.

So I have been racking my brain....WHAT would I do?! Another side note I should probably mention, I have to document this in photographs and bring them back to her. So I can't just dismiss the question, which is what I would probably would have originally done. She knows me so well :)
I have a few ideas—so we will see how it transfers to photographs.

Imagine you had only ONE week to live and you still had to keep your job, what would YOU do?